This is gross

So last night, I made this delicious Eggplant Lasagne, and my kids ate a bunch of it. Even Beloved Youngest Son, who normally won't eat vegetables and who is notoriously picky, ate a bunch of it. (He is so skinny. I want to get as much nutrition into him as possible. Beloved Eldest Son, on the other hand, eats like crazy and weighs 87 lbs--this is important to know--and is only a centimeter shorter than me.) Everything had gone well, I fed everyone, put Giant Bird to bed, put the kids to bed, and settled in to watch Adult Swim.

Around two in the morning, Beloved Youngest Son started making whimpering noises in his sleep. I moved closer to comfort him. All of a sudden, he started spewing puke! He was still asleep, and still lying on his back. He started to vomit again--still asleep, still on his back, puke fountaining out his mouth. I rolled him on his side so he wouldn't aspirate. Again, still asleep, he threw up. Bright red puke all over the bed. He didn't wake up until he was in the shower, having his hair washed.

I couldn't wake Beloved Eldest Son up to get him off the bed so I could clean and change the sheets. So I put some quilts on the floor and lifted him out of bed. He didn't wake up.

While Beloved Youngest was in the shower, I cleaned up the throw-up, stripped the bed, and flipped the mattress (which, fortunately, had stayed dry--it's a psychological thing, I'm an emetophobe). Everyone was just settling in again (Beloved Eldest still sleeping) with Beloved Youngest on an underpad with a plastic bag to barf in, when Round Two started. Fortunately, the underpad worked, and the final set of sheets was spared, but Beloved Youngest had to go back into the shower.

By the time I had showered and taken out the garbage and gotten ready for bed again, it was dawn and the birds outside were chirping.

When the kids woke up today, Beloved Eldest Son was confused that the sheet had changed underneath him! He had slept through the whole ordeal. Now they are both up and chipper, and trying to come up with an alphabet of swear-words. (Don't ask.)

Why is it that every single time the kids come out here someone throws up?! I may invest in a rubber sheet.